Life transitions weirdly sometimes. Today I had the impulse to remove a level of confusion from my life. It hadn't been my plan to do so for a while. But the feeling that the time was right came over me and I spoke the words. I'm sad about it but feel comforted, greatly, by the reaction of others.
And I'm happy about it. I've recognized since late-April that certain things were holding me back. I resisted letting those things go for a variety of reasons...and I still wouldn't have done things differently. But a part of me is happy that the confusion should lessen now.
I'm also happy about it because I will admit last night a bit of feeling...not guilty per se but more that sense of a sort of betrayal even though there's absolutely no one and nothing I'm betraying by having enjoyed that kiss with Guy 8-K.
Still, it feels a little weird to see a possible door opening and knowing a door is closing all within 12 hours of each other. I'm glad the one door did not slam shut...and I think I might enjoy peeking through the opening door for a while here.
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