K actually struggled with his reaction to me going to the driving range with Guy 2 - B. He said he expected better of himself and that I should have guy friends.
Coining a phrase a friend used, I explained to K that we can't help how we feel; we can only be honest about it and either come to understand why we feel that way, or discuss it with the other person and see if they can't help the understanding. This is, in fact, what we ultimately did. Although I still don't understand the root cause of his concern, it seems like he did and says its something he wants to work on.
When I mentioned Guy 2 - B also had a couple of professional contacts that I was interested in following up on, K seemed to become much more comfortable with the whole proposition.
And for the record, Guy 2 - B mostly respected the boundary of "being friends" but at some point, I met a couple of his guy friends and that got back to Guy 2 - B's ex-wife and she's already flung out the "your girlfriend" thing at Guy 2 - B. That disturbed me a bit because it seemed like Guy 2 - B might not be respecting the boundary when I'm not around. Ugh. Trying to make just friends is almost as hard as finding a great guy.
K's willingness to talk things through...even if he was still a bit guarded on the why he felt that way...tends to indicate K is a great guy. It's still early, but I'm really glad I met him.
Did you see "Life on Mars"? One character referred to another as "2B" because of the apartment numbering. I smile every time I see "Guy 2 - B."
ReplyDeleteYou should have friends. Their sex shouldn't matter. Almost all of my close friends are women: I find women interesting and I like to be with them. No reason K should care if one of your peeps is a man or a woman.
If 2-B is talking about his "new girlfriend" you'd be right to kick him to the curb.
Glad you and K are talking instead of pressure-cooking. That's a good sign.